Legacy~

The Lord called my father home early this morning in his sleep~  I am completely heartbroken because I will miss him so.....the children are heartbroken beyond measure because their papa was everything to them.  Dad developed a very high fever on Sunday evening and though I begged  him as well as mom....he said he was so ....tired and didn't want to go to the emergency room...he just wanted to rest and sleep in his own bed with my mom.  They missed each other terribly with all the trips in and out of the hospital....and so we picked him up because he was so weak and placed him in bed and and though Tom and I wanted to spend the night; he would have none of it....he wanted us home with our family for our children.  So I kissed him goodnight and told him I loved him and fluffed his pillows as I do always~  he told me he loved me....he told Tom he loved him and to be the strong man he knew he was....and told him he loved him too~ and of course Tom told him he loved him.....and we said goodnight...planning on seeing him in the morning but that was not to be~  The Lord called him home out of his suffering .....no more amputations or wounds or dialysis which he dreaded because it was so very painful.....My father is healed and whole walking again and reunited with his parents.....I grieve because I will miss him so....his crazy sense of humor...his teasing.....his voice.....his presence.  I grieve for my mother who fell in love with him at thirteen....I grieve for my children who their papa was everything to~  But his legacy of love will live forever in his children and grandchildren and generations to come....who will know the Lord because of his faithfulness....who will be kind and loving and compassionate because of the example he set for us.....who will raise strong families because family meant everything to him...and for that I am amazed and thankful for ~  My father was a man who never forgot to ask you how you were doing....because he truly cared for others.  He will forever live in my heart and I was blessed beyond measure to have him as my father and be able to be raised by a godly man.  I love you dad now and forever and one day I know I will see you again but until than know there will never be a day that passes that I will not somehow be touched by you~ and the way you influenced my life......

Changes~

I spoke to Tom this evening and he seemed so blue~   it really is a cause for concern...he is just wanting to work so desperately...to the point where I believe he is just being too hard on himself.  He has been in Winter Haven just two days~ looking for work...and I believe that God is going to open the doors for my husband and give him work.  He is a good man with a good heart that just wants to provide for his family and I know that God sees this; I just wish he knew it also~  So I continue to pray for him and I  continue to ask God to strengthen him.  I am tired tonight; mom and I were in the hospital all day with dad.  He was to have surgery this morning on his foot...I saw it today for the first time and it looks bad...very bad but I know we serve a mighty God who can do all things~ so I am entrusting my dad to his care....there is no better place.  He will Lord-willing have the surgery tomorrow at 7:30.  We will be at the hospital before the sun rises~ and it will be cold very cold here is sunny south Florida....25 degrees!  So much for Al Gore and global warming~  Dad is in good spirits...trusting himself to God.  Mom is weary but she keeps going~  I pray for her too that God would continue to strengthen her through this very difficult time.  The kids are starting to accept that we will probably be moving~ knowing that this would be best for their dad has helped to shape their perspective on it.  I do believe that God is going to move and I just cannot wait!

A Funny~

Trip~

Tom leaves tomorrow for his trip~  I am very excited for him.  He needs so very much to get away and be around people who are an encouragement.  Sometimes a change of scenery is a very good thing.
I am hoping that he will be there through at least Wednesday.  He is getting his things together and I think he has a sense of anticipation as well~  I believe this could very well be the thing our family needs a fresh start.  Somewhere new where we can our children and once again feel at peace.  A sense of security for them....something I know they need and I want for them.  I am nervous and excited at the possibilities.  I know the Lord has us in His hands and I believe that He will step in and help us.  I am going to stay home this time around as dad has surgery on Tuesday.  He has two ulcers on his foot and they need to make sure the infection has not set into his bone.  I don't want my mom to have to be there alone....and I really need to step it up and start packing~  the thought is overwhelming!  I am going to make every effort to get rid of the things we don't need...clear out the clutter...and take what we need and of course the kids things.  I am happy that they may be able to have their own rooms that way the transition will be easier.  Gabby and Amanda have very different tastes in decorating..Gabby is still very much my little girl and loves her horses and her collectible dolls and Amanda quite the young woman now...oh my~ the years fly and in a blink they've grown. Time to make new and happy memories~ establish new traditions as well...
 

Thursday night~

Tom will be leaving Sunday afternoon to stay with a friend in Winter Haven~  he got a lead on a printing company that is hiring and called and they asked for his resume.  I looked them up and they happen to be a Christian company~ so he will be stopping in on Monday to follow-up.  She was also able to get some information on housing for us....I thank God for her!  Please be praying with me that Tom's check comes in that way we are able to put down a deposit ; should he find something.  I told my dad last night and he was very positive about it~ still I know that it will be hard.  I am looking forward to a new start and still a bit apprehensive about the change for all of us...but I know the Lord will take care of us.  The stress has me in a bit of a flare so I have been spending a great deal of time resting...just not a whole lot of energy for much~ but I work tomorrow at church so I am sure I will need some caffeine!  Gabby had a wonderful time last night at her party for her bible study.  I was so happy to see this!  I am hoping that she can see her friends again before Christmas.  Austin had a nice and quiet birthday which is what he enjoys~ I am glad he was able to do exactly what he wanted....mostly drama free.  I can't believe my son is now sixteen!  The kids are growing so fast; I miss the days when they were little and life was easier..but nothing to do but move along.

I am thankful tonight that my hubby came to church~ it had been a while ....and I know that he is really struggling with what is happening to our lives.  It meant a great deal to Amanda as she was singing in the choir tonight.  She is starting up with choir as they are getting ready for the Christmas eve services.  I am thankful that I have a daughter who loves the Lord.  Tom is making plans to go this week to stay with a friend in order to see if he can find work.  It will be two hours from where we live now~  the children are apprehensive at the thought of possibly leaving everyone and everything they know but I know that God has a plan.  My friend tells me that there is a great deal of work in her neck of the woods and so time will tell~  Tom is planning on leaving after Austin's 16th birthday ; which is on Tuesday.  I am not sure where all the years have gone..just seem to have flown by in a blink~ Too quickly.  I thank the Lord for all the wonderful memories we have of the kids and family and I pray the Lord would bless us with more.  I have to trust the if the Lord takes us from here; that we will have a sense of peace that at this time we just do not have.  God just appears to be closing doors here.....slamming them actually.  We will not be able to move into my cousin's home because of the hoa and so now we must start looking ....really looking~ I am just praying that God would bring my husband full-time employment; so we can find a home.  I saw a dear friend tonight at church and her concern and love for my family was just overwhelming.  It means a great deal to know that I have people praying for our family...it means a great deal to know that my friends really care.  So I continue to pray and know I am praying that the Lord would give us crystal clear direction where He wants us and that the way be provided.

Steps~

The Lord reminded me today that he will not leave us nor will He forsake us~   We are His children after all..Lord willing Tom's check will come in on Friday~ and than this weekend I will start to work on the application for the hoa for the rental.  I would ask dear friends that you could join me in prayer...we must be approved to rent the townhouse.  We need to move in the next several weeks and we must have a home to call our own.  I just want a little security for our family~ especially the children.  I am thankful that my boss at church has been more than accommodating by giving me more hours at the church.  Tom continues to look for work and I have another interview on Friday for a job at Macy's.  I have signed up for school and will be taking courses online so that I can work in a school and possibly do evaluations at the end of the year.  One step at a time...that is all I can do~  I believe the Lord knows my heart and that of  Tom.