God is good~

God has been good to me....God is so good~I remember singing these words as a little girl in church and as I reflect on all the changes that our family has been through; I find that indeed He has been good.  Hubby now has a job!!  That he really enjoys...with a boss that treats his employees well.  We have just returned from a vacation with the children that got us away for Thanksgiving...a good time was had by all. Austin has finally gotten a diagnoses; Connective tissue disease. Now he will be on medication and Lord willing and with much prayer; his condition will improve.  There have been many little things along the way that add up and that I will try to never take for granted again.  Now I am praying to be able to embrace this third holiday season without my dad.  There is the void of his presence at his favorite time of year.  I don't suppose it will get easier for many holidays to come~but I want to embrace the spirit we once had before his passing. So I am going to decorate something we haven't done in two years.  We will have a tree~we all agreed.  Last year no one wanted one...and we will watch Christmas specials and plan what to do for Christmas.  God was and is so good to me.

Sunday

This week was my first week back at work after several weeks off.  September is beginning to become a hard time of year for me due to the extreme Summer here in sunny south Florida.  So it was my yearly week spent in the hospital and back home again to recuperate.  It was a so good to be back in my classroom with my little munchkins...they were so happy to see me.  Nothing like great big hugs from little ones to make you feel loved and appreciated. I am the only one up this Sunday morning as the kids and Tom had a late night watching movies and playing games.  I am enjoying the silence and my coffee.  It was a hard day yesterday~lots of pain from getting back into the swings of things at school.  I am going to simply spend the day taking it easy and getting ready for the week ahead.  Very thankful that Tom got an appointment with UPS tomorrow morning!  We have been praying that he would be able to get in for an interview.  So tomorrow at 6 am bright and early he will be meeting with them.  I continue to pray for my husband~that God will impress upon him that he has not been forgotten.  That God would allow him to see that he does indeed have a plan for his life~that he will continue to take our family through whatever he has allowed in our path.  So I continue to trust and look for the Lord to provide...and his provision has been consistent and good.  Watching Pastor Stanley this morning and he is saying that" every trial in our life has a divine prescription"...Count it all joy!  I am counting~and I am so very thankful that the God of creation loves me enough to continue to hold me up even when I don't think that I can keep going...that the God of heaven above loves me enough to give me the strength I need for another day.  Thank you Father for loving me.

God is Faithful~

God is forever faithful; in the big and small things of life.  Tom lost his job two weeks ago Friday..and to say this didn't send me into a tailspin would not be honest.  I saw it coming...and yet when it happens~well that is something all together different.  I began to pray...there are times throughout the day when my munchkins are napping and it is quiet and I sit there and pray and just talk to the Lord...telling him what is going on and how if it were  not for him; I would have lost it a long time ago.  So I began a job search and found one at a Christian school and I thought ok this is what God has for me.  Not the perfect school but more money.  Well~the Lord had other plans...plans that I could not see....I was offered a good raise to stay right where I am with a job that is five minutes from my home.  God is good!  He is faithful; even when I have lost hope.  I know that I cannot see the big picture and the reason for all the twists and turns but he does and in his time; it will be revealed.  I ask each day for the strength and energy I need to get through and he has provided.  I have asked for continued provision and he has provided...I know that he will continue to walk with me through this bumpy ride and he will continue to guide and direct me steps.  It hasn't been easy and there are days I am overwhelmed but he continues to provide me the comfort that can only be given by him...and for that I am so very thankful.

The Joy of the Lord~

I love the Psalms....David had been through and seen many things~and God was there in the middle of it all.  His failings...triumphs.  Well~I know that God is in the middle of my stress and I am thankful that although I have no idea of the why...He will continue to give me the strength to keep walking.  Tom is going to be let go tomorrow from his job...again.  I know that this is not a shock for the Lord and I know that He will continue to provide for our family.  It has been many hills and valleys these past several years but the JOY of the LORD IS MY STRENGTH!  When I am feeling at a loss; He is there.  When I am questioning; He is there.  When I think I cannot take another moment; He is there....and I tell you enough that He has carried me through because on my own I would not have the strength to walk.  So even though I may not know what God is up too; I wait and trust and believe that He does indeed have a plan.

 

Progress~

It seems as if time has been just flying by~one day simply  blends into another.  I would like to think that I am beginning to become accustomed to the steady rhythm of each day....and I am to a certain extent.  Still missing being at home but I suppose this is something that won't go away; so I am still adjusting to my new normal.  I do enjoy being with the little ones each day and helping them in their development.  As I take care of these little ones each day; I am reminded of how thankful I am that I was able to be home with my children for such a very long time.  I was there for their first steps and words and all the milestones that the parents I help on a daily basis are missing out on....I was blessed beyond belief!  The kids have adapted to my schedule although they would love to have me home but! we have come a long way from where we were this time last year.  Progress~no matter how small the steps is still progress.  We are going to be moving a half and hour North of here in the next month.  I am both excited because Austin finally gets a room again and a little nervous because it is to a new town I am not familiar with at all.  There will be driving involved now for all getting to work and church and activities and we will not be around the corner from my aunt or across the street from mom.....but God opened a door for us and we are ready to walk through. 

Quite the week~

It's been quite the week~I had an altercation at work with a fellow employee...it was really surreal.  Thankfully I had an interview that afternoon at a preschool...and I got the job!  So happy that the Lord in his mercy took me out of this situation.  I am working on my licensing and once I have it they would like to offer me another job at the school~which won't be disclosed until than.  So I will be studying and working quite hard to get it done.  Amanda starts school in two weeks and Gabby will be babysitting this summer for her cousins several days during the week.  Austin is going to be taking it easy and trying to get healthy.  Tom is working hard and trying to get business.  So things here at home are busy.  I will be officially starting my new job at the end of the week and than Amanda and I will be visiting a friend this weekend.  I am really looking forward to getting away into new surrounding for a bit.  Time to refresh and recharge.  I continue to press on~trying to let the Lord guide and direct me and believing that He will put me right where he wants me.  This has been a long season of many ups and downs but God has and continues to take our family through it all and for that I am thankful.

Time to regroup~

Life has been a little hectic as of late~still getting used to being away from home on a daily basis..it is hard and difficult.  I miss my kids~I miss my routine...I miss my old life.  I am thankful for all the many years I was able to stay home with the kids and really be a homemaker.  I am thankful now for a job that helps our family.  It is just different and something that I am sure will take time a lot of time to become my new norm.  Tom was away for a week for training and it went very well.  He is slowly finding his footing and it will take time in this economy here in Florida to get to where he would like to be but all good things take time.  Amanda is starting her apprenticeship at church this summer and looking to start college in August.  Gabby continues daily with her studies and I am trying to be patient as she has been through so much.  Austin is on a break for now as he continues to struggle with his health and we cannot take him to the doctor until we get health insurance.  By allowing him to take this time and just concentrate on his writing and just taking care of himself he is less stressed and not feeling as sick...so this is what needs to be done.  I know that God is going to put our lives back together~he has already shown himself faithful to our family; so I am just going to continue to trust and hold on tight.  I found myself last week running and although I thought I was praying and in the word~it just wasn't registering....so I just found myself today asking the Lord to really let me hear him and really let me get what he is teaching me during this season.  I just want the be the wife/mother he wants me to be; because the biggest ministry I will ever have is to my family.

Diary of a part time poet: Please wait to be connected to awesomeness

 My Gabby has launched her own blog~ and while I am most certainly partial....I have to say it is good...really good.  She is pouring out her heart and sharing what God is teaching her~ and that to me is simply awesome.


Diary of a part time poet: Please wait to be connected to awesomeness: What comes to mind when you think awesome? A car? The Hunger Games? That out going popular kid you wish you could be like? Well,how about yo...

Prayer Needed!

I am asking for prayer for my dear Uncle Henry Toro.  He is such a strong man of God.  He was raised for quite sometime by my parents...so I grew up having him as a big brother~I have so many wonderful memories of my him.  Since dad's passing he has stepped up and been a real sounding board for me and Tom.  He suffered his fourth heart attack this past Saturday and was to have an angioplasty today but the tests came back with very bad news of extensive damage to most of his valves....so tomorrow morning at five am he will be having open heart surgery.  I would so appreciate prayer for him.  He has a fifteen year old son and two precious grandchildren as well as another son and daughter.  He has been married for over thirty years to my Aunt Sharon.  I am praying for guidance and wisdom for the doctors.  Strength for his family and complete healing for him.  Thank you all so much!

So very thankful~ Tom got the job!!  He starts training on Monday.  He was told they would like to train him to be a sales manager....so I am sending the Lord before..praying that he would find favor with fellow employees and of course his bosses.  He is a hard worker and simply needs a chance.  I continue to work at the bank~ everyone is pleasant though it is hard for me to be standing for hours on end.  I just get up everyday and send the Lord before~ he has given me the ability to get through each day.  I am going to be looking into taking some classes~ so many avenues out there...going to pray and see where the Lord opens doors.  Gabby had a wonderful time this this weekend at the student leadership conference.  Austin and Amanda spent the weekend at Titi Sylvia's house watching movies..playing Pokeno and snacking.  Going to spend the next day resting up for the week of work ahead.  So thankful for God's continued provision.

I am free~

Life has been moving at a frantic pace as of late~ the days just seem to blend together.  I have working a great deal....six days a week...But! so thankful as Tom is still looking for work.  God is good giving me the strength I need each day.  So looking forward to Sunday~the day of rest.  Tom is excited; he has a job interview on Monday!   The job is in his field and last year this company had offered him a position but it was as a contractor..now the terms of employment have changed and they are offering a base and commissions as well as expense allowance..so we will see what transpires.  It is in Gods hands!   God continues to be faithful to our family~ and I continue to pray for direction and guidance in our lives.  There are days when I wonder  when the  Lord will deliver us from this season in our lives but on those days I just really try to remember that I have to trust~ its not easy but I was reminded this morning during my quiet time that we are no meant for this world...it is not our home.  A thought I have to tell you I find comforting.  I am trying to relax in my Father's arms~ reminding myself I am not in control and you know what I am learning; I don't have to be! and this is a really freeing realization.

Caught the cold~

Well~it was just a matter of time until I caught Tom's and Austie's cold...so nice of them to share. :)  So it was quite the day at work because I had run out of cold medicine and took an allergy pill instead...I felt like I was sleepwalking all day but I got through even with a meeting tonight.  The job continues to go well and everyone is very nice but I do indeed need to work full-time...I just keep praying and waiting on the Lord as I know His timing is not mine.  Tomorrow morning I have a phone interview for a personal banking position and it is right around the corner from the house~so we will see what happens.  I spent the weekend revamping my resume and it may just pay off.  So I have put it in the Lord's hands because I have learned it has to be His will.  I just continue to apply and network~something is bound to happen.  This past weekend was wonderful at church as we had Hillsong with Darlene leading worship all weekend.  It was really a beautiful time. The girls and I were so blessed and refreshed.  I am looking into going back to school...it is both exciting and terrifying all at  once.  The kids are very supportive. They think its great that not only are they studying but mom and dad are joining them.  I have been thinking of dad a great deal lately~wondering what his advice to us would be....than I remind myself that I do indeed know what he would say and it is just missing his voice his presence in our lives.  So many emotions...so many changes but what gets me through is staying in prayer and the word; it's not easy and somedays are harder than others but I get up each morning and start my day and put Him in charge....He has not let me down yet~daily..moment by moment...He gives me the strength needed.

Provision~

My review went very well~better than I could have anticipated.  I am so thankful~they are very happy with my performance and can't believe that I have been there only two months.  I believe that the Lord placed me where I am at...and I am more than thankful.  My manager and supervisor have offered to teach me everything that they know and have told me that I can take any of the classes online that are available...so I am going to make like a sponge and soak it all up!  I spoke with the branch manager about getting more hours because of Tom's layoff and she is going to try to get me as close to full-time as possible.  On Monday she is going to call the managers in the area and ask if I can work at their branches in the morning before I come in...and than she told me that I can pick up as many Saturday's as I like~I just need to ask each week who would like me to fill in for them.  So I think the Lord is opening doors to provision and that makes me very happy; I believe that God will not leave our family...no matter what the circumstances may look like.  His promises are for today, tomorrow and our future.

Trust~

It's been a week~of having Tom home full-time....his department was eliminated at work last Thursday.  It has been a week of ups and downs...it's been a week of blind trust~this I know didn't surprise the Lord and so I wait and pray and lean heavily on faith.  Tom is going back to school~after a great deal of resistance...it is the right thing to do and he has come to the conclusion that he needs to get a new career.  He is going to continue to look for work and Lord willing he will find something soon.  I have my review tomorrow with my branch manager and supervisor.....it is in Gods hands.  I know that they are happy with my performance...but whether they will offer me more hours remain to be seen.  They both know that Tom has lost his job and that I need to work full-time.  I am still putting my resume out everywhere~and I have had some interviews but getting back into banking is a long process; they do not make quick decisions.  The kids are anxious but I keep reminding them God is in control.  So it is one day at a time~that is all we can do and trust that God will take care of us.

It's not easy~

God is faithful~ always...through the good times and bad.  He is there with me on the days when I can feel his presences and when I am just barely keeping my head above the water.  Faith is something that God has been teaching me through these last four years~ it has been that long!  There are days when I wake in the morning and feel as if I am old and gray and on those days...I pray that God grants me the grace to get up and do the things I must...and sometimes it is just the ability to get through the day.  I am writing tonight just not for myself~ though this blog has been a diary/journal of sort ...but for those of you~ dear friends who are right there in the middle of the fight of your life.  When you think that you just can't take another hurt another disappointment in life~ I tell you that He cares....really He does.  I am reminded that we are going to be refined...a process that is not an easy one...a process that I have learned is uncomfortable and even very painful at times but just when I think I don't have it in me to continue believing that God has a plan; I get a glimpse of what He has in store~ I am blessed..very blessed by having had wonderful loved ones in my life...I am blessed by God giving me three special and unique children...I have been blessed by God giving me a husband who loves his family.  It has been a struggle but with every struggle God has shown me that He does care and love us and that He indeed does have a plan; though I don't see it now.  So please dear friends when you think you can't possibly keep going~ look up and release it all into His hands.  I can assure you that He is waiting there you to cast your cares...just release it all and step into his waiting arms.