Thursday evening~

Amanda is all packed~ my....don't know what I am going to do without her for five weeks!  I know that she is excited and can't wait to get away and on with her graduation trip~  Austin and Gabby I am sure would have loved to have gone also but both hate to fly and don't like being away from home and mom for that long...so I will have to come up with some fun things to do while she is gone.  The weather has been really unpredictable as of late here...Rain has been a constant...Gabs says if she wanted this much rain she would move to Seattle..and she doesn't understand how anyone could live in those conditions without being depressed.  My Gabby has always had a flair for the dramatic.  She has some great things to look forward to next week ...party with her life group and choir weekend.  I am thankful that she has gotten involved.  I am praying that Austin can find a friend that he has things in common with and could really develop a friendship.   Austin has gotten to be a real loner especially since dad's passing.  He is my sensitive one who takes so much on; he lays in bed at night thinking~  We all could use some levity in our lives.  Tom is still waiting to hear from Miami about the position here...so we wait and pray.  I am praying that the Lord would give my husband a job that he enjoys ...that will use all the skills that are going to waste at his present job at the dealership.  Took my aunt to the doc today to have the stitches looked at from the surgery and they said that it is healing incredibly well...especially since she still has not given up smoking.  She tells me it is the hardest thing she has ever done..just praying she completely quits soon.  I know the stress of losing dad and grandma has a great deal to do with having started smoking so much.  She treated me to breakfast after the appointment ...very nice.  I am hoping that when she gets home from the trip with Mandy that she will start to get out more...hoping that she doesn't lose her hair from the radiation.  Austin has his follow-up tomorrow with the doctor.  I am hoping that we will get some answers to all this fatigue and pain he is experiencing.  I am praying that he doesn't have Lupus.  I am planning on asking for a referral for further testing.  I just want him to feel happy and healthy like any sixteen year old should.  Mom broke up with her boyfriend after speaking with her brothers....very thankful for this as he didn't treat her as well as he should have.  I know she is just lonely and very uncertain about what she will do...Thankfully; she has a very good girlfriend that has continued to keep her busy.  This has been an answer to prayer.  Now we are praying that she can find a full-time job.  I am regrouping after my retail "adventure"....I will be back working at the end of August at church...and of course schooling the kids...taking care of the house ...and our family.  I am praying about applying for another position at church that is available.  It is still part-time but 20-25 hours  and this would be perfect for me.  Just feeling a little up in the air right now with all the changes~  Tom had to go to our old house to pick up a package that was delivered there incorrectly last week...that was very hard.  He said there are college girls living in my old home....knowing that was a difficult pill to swallow.  He had completely built a gourmet kitchen for me to cook in and all the little touches that we had done specially put in with love for our family.  Felt like it is an end to a dream...but I rebounded after the week....so much...so very much..I keep asking the Lord why?!  I will let you all know when he answers~ so I continue to hang in and hold on...because really is there any other choice?  Just taking it one moment at a time because really that is all I can do~ and that's ok.